1) I am too lazy to learn songs properly, choosing instead to just fit whatever word seems closest to the phonetic sound I hear. This means that nothing I sing makes any logical sense. However, they are all wildly creative. Every once in a while I actually figure out what the words are supposed to be and realize how much sense the song now makes. What’s funny is that there are certain songs I’m suck in a perpetual loop with. I learn what they are, promptly forget and go back to my nonsense, and then have that deja vu moment when I understand them again. Maybe I was dropped on my head as a child.
2) I love to travel but hate flying. As a result, I spent much of my life gripping the arms of my airplane seat while whispering “please don’t fall” for hours on end. Happily, my doctor informed me a few years ago (while staring at me like I was an idiot upon hearing how I coped) that since my way didn’t work, I might want to try drugs. Miracles of modern science, indeed!
3) Speaking of travel–the first time I went to Italy, I was 15 yrs old. We were in Heathrow waiting for our flight to Rome and I’d fallen asleep stretched out across the chairs at the departure area. I woke up to the sight of the Italian National Football (Soccer) team seated around me. Even at that tender age, I was partial to that particular flavour of man candy. So I shot up and might have tried to shove my little brother under a seat in an attempt to look like a worldly solo traveller. Yeah, right. I wish you all a similar wake up call with *insert group of hot men of your choice*.
4) I was a professional screenwriter for 12 years. Crazy things happen in writers’ rooms. On one of my favourite shows to work on, the showrunner and I plotted out the entire season arc’s battle using Smurfs. This was for a kids’ show. We’d renamed them with our characters’ names and did their voices and everything. On another, not a kids’ show, there was an actual meeting to discuss the star’s wife’s Playboy photos. There can be this intimidating mystique around film and television. Don’t believe any of it.
5) I forget that my husband is one of my followers on Twitter. This leads to a lot of head shaking when I’ve been a bit too vigorous discussing hot guys – fictional or otherwise and steamy reads. I try to push the excuse that it’s simply ways of interacting with social media friends and readers. I think I’ve gotten away with it but I’m not sure because I am no longer able to make eye contact with him.
6) I hold a Masters’ Degree in Film Theory. Yes, you read that right. In watching movies. Okay, and criticizing them. Possibly the most useless degree known to mankind. Not only that, I did my Master’s thesis on Gender and Spectatorship in the animation of Chuck Jones. Which means that I watched Bugs Bunny Cartoons for two years. My family despaired. They used to lie and say I was studying journalism. I share this with you so that if your family gives you any grief about your area of study, you can use me as an example of how it could be so much worse. You’re welcome.
7) I think that the right shade of lipstick and a great head of hair can be a woman’s finest accessory. Who’s with me here?
8) I think the world needs more choreography. I have a constant soundtrack in my head and like to tap dance my way through the day. In my head, it comes off like a brilliant Gene Kelly-esque routine. I take no responsibility for how it looks in reality. Obviously, you all just need to see things in my special way.
9) I love my Kindle because it allows me to read my steamy romances to my heart’s content without the constant judging I get from haters who obviously are down on love. I’ve found that if I nod my head sagely whilst reading, people think I’m engrossed in some deep literary classic and perhaps feel bad for not reading such a weighty tome themselves. I feel no guilt for this. I’ve had too many years of snotty reactions to all the genre reading I’ve done.
10) Since I write romantic comedies, I’ll share a couple of my favs with you. Book: Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie. This is the smexiest book around. (Ha – autocorrect wanted it to be the smelliest book around.) Film: When Harry Met Sally and The Princess Bride. Don’t make me choose. It could get ugly.
Now it’s your turn. Share scintillating facts in the comments section below. And don’t worry. No judgment. I mean, seriously. Did you see what I shared?
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Husband just remembered that once, when asked what she wanted to be when she grew up, my kid replied, “I wanna be on stilts!” #soproud
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